About Me

I'm Christal. You may find yourself wondering about the title of this blog. I mean really, what could be more uninteresting than The Real Housewife of Santee. I figured if those crazies from the Bravo network can call themselves housewives, then anyone can. While I'm not a housewife, I assure you that I am real and indeed a wife. Finally, we live in Santee, Calif., so there's that boring explanation.

I'm also the mother of two children. Real Boy, who's seven and his sister, Real Girl who is  four. I am most likely the farthest thing from your typical wife and mother. I drink, I smoke (Update: I quit smoking. I really miss it!), and I curse like a sailor.

I started this blog out of the sheer need to escape the madness that is motherhood, full-time employment, a husband and two dogs. In other words, life. It's kind of like therapy, only cheaper. In my past life (before kids) I spent time running the streets with my friends thinking we could change the world. I was enlisted in the Navy for ten years (this is probably why I curse like a sailor) where I worked as a journalist. I loved my job while enlisted. I miss it everyday.

Once I had my daughter, I realized my need to be home for the kids. Mainly, I did it for the Real Husband who I'm pretty sure would have lost his mind if I had to deploy for six to nine months. He's what I kindly call challenged in the nurturing department. Others may call him an asshole, but he's my asshole. Wait, that sounds weird. The point is, I love him.

After the Navy, I became employed full time by the Department of Defense. It's not my dream job, but it's a job and I get to come home everyday to the kids. Although, that six months of deployment sounds delightful when the kids are driving me out of my gourd.

So here I sit, writing this blog in an effort to have some me time. I'm including five random facts about myself that are in no way needed, but hey, it's fun.

1.  My pinkie toes are like little nubs. Seriously, those things are disturbing. I think I'm missing a joint in there because they don't really move. Maybe I should ask my mom if she smoked when pregnant with me causing my toes to not fully develop. After all, it was the '70s.
2. I love to sing karaoke. I'm not the best singer, but I can carry a tune. I also secretly pretend I'm auditioning for American Idol when I'm driving in my car. I'm waiting for the day someone catches me doing this. Embarrassing.
3. When I was 17, I went to Haiti on a mission trip with my church. It changed me significantly. I hope to adopt a child from Haiti when my kids are older. I also believe this is when my intolerance for lazy yet entitled Americans kicked in.
4. I think pizza is the best food ever. I could eat it everyday and never tire of the cheesy goodness that is pizza. I even like those crappy frozen pizzas. It's a little sad actually.
5.  I'm 'biracial', or as I say, I'm half black, half white. My mom is the whitey. As a young kid, I didn't realize our family was any different. It wasn't until I was called "blackie" and "nigger" that I realized something was different. But, as my mom told me, "You're just as much as white as they are." Not true, but helpful to a kid who was a little confused.

So that's me in a nutshell. Now, let's get to know each other a little better shall we?

Got a question? Send it to me below.